But not this year. We haven't lost a playoff game yet. And whether or not the Royals win four out of the next seven games, we're still in the World Series. That's huge. And because of how big it is, no one can stop talking about it. The streets of Kansas City are practically overflowing with champagne and BBQ sauce, with Royals fans floating down the river of hope surrounded by Boulevard Wheat and Arthur Bryant's ribs and various other beef items. This is heaven as we know it, as we've imagined it for nearly three decades. Three. Decades.
So, we need a song to match this excitement. The natural fit is Royals by Lorde, and it appears that now is the time. Here's a quick history on the Royals, the song, and why it's upsetting Californians.
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1969
The Royals are born. They're named after KC's rich history of cows and cow-related activities.
(source: Wall Street Journal)
1983
The Pine Tar Incident occurs while the Royals are playing the Yankees. Fans lose their minds. George Brett instantly makes MLB history and folklore.
1985
The Royals win the World Series. Fans lose their minds again.
1986-2013
Nothing. Nothing happens. The Royals don't make the World Series, let alone the playoffs. Some of your favorite baseball players played here and then immediately left. Not to say that the Royals were terrible, but an evening game at Kauffman Stadium made for a pretty cheap date.
JUNE 2013
A teenage New Zealand singer-songwriter named Lorde releases a song called "Royals". Everyone in the world loses their minds. It's about how she'll never be rich or live a lavish lifestyle.
The song makes her millions of dollars.
NOVEMBER 2013
Inexplicably, it is revealed that Lorde came up with the title of her song after seeing a picture of George Brett with "Royals" on his jersey from 1976.
Again, it's worth a reminder that she's a teenager. From New Zealand. Born 11 years after the Royals last made the playoffs. Born 20 years after this picture was taken.
This is a true story.
(Source: National Geographic)
APRIL 2014
George Brett and Lorde meet. This is glorious.
SEPTEMBER/OCTOBER 2014
The Royals earn a spot to the playoffs for the first time in 29 years. They win the wildcard game in Kansas City against the Oakland Athletics, and they've been winning ever since. They get to the World Series. KC has lost its mind.
LAST WEEKEND
Some radio stations in San Francisco -- whose Giants will be playing in the World Series against the Royals -- refuse to play Lorde's "Royals" so as not to encourage the Royals, and definitely not because the song has been playing every hour on the hour for the past 14 months regardless of how a baseball team has been performing.
TODAY
A radio station in Kansas City plans to play "Royals" every hour to support the Royals, and not necessarily because it's an incredibly popular song that has been playing every hour for the past 14 months regardless of how a baseball team has been performing.
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So there it is. The cows that inspired a team that inspired a city that inspired a song that inspired the world, including the city that inspired it, and made another city very angry.
GO ROYALS!
